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Manners & Etiquette

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FHE Scripture


Ephesians 4: 29-32
29 Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers.
30 And grieve not the holy Spirit of God, whereby ye are sealed unto the day of redemption.
31 Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice:
32 And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.

Proverbs 16:24
24 Pleasant words are as an honeycomb, sweet to the soul, and health to the bones.

FHE Lesson Hymn


Let us Oft Speak Kind Words

1. Let us oft speak kind words to each other
At home or where’er we may be;
Like the warblings of birds on the heather,
The tones will be welcome and free.
They’ll gladden the heart that’s repining,
Give courage and hope from above,
And where the dark clouds hide the shining,
Let in the bright sunlight of love.

Oh, the kind words we give shall in memory live
And sunshine forever impart.
Let us oft speak kind words to each other;
Kind words are sweet tones of the heart.

2. Like the sunbeams of morn on the mountains,
The soul they awake to good cheer;
Like the murmur of cool, pleasant fountains,
They fall in sweet cadences near.
Let’s oft, then, in kindly toned voices,
Our mutual friendship renew,
Till heart meets with heart and rejoices
In friendship that ever is true.

FHE Lesson


Start with several questions (adapting and changing according to age):

What are manners?
What do you say when you want someone to hand or give you something?
What are polite phrases/manners?

(Please, may I?, thank you, you are welcome, excuse me, etc)

Describe situations when you would use the phrases/words.

*For Younger Children* Role play situations when manners are needed. Say “Please” if you want something. Say “Thank You” if someone gives it to you. Say “You are Welcome” is someone says “Thank You” to you. Say “Excuse Me” if you need to pass in front or between someone. Etc….

*Adapting for Teenagers* Share the story of Elmer & Geraldine.

It started with a phone call. Elmer wanted to ask Geraldine for a date to the prom, but she hadn’t been his first choice. So when Geraldine answered the phone, Elmer blurted out, “I couldn’t get anyone else to go with me; do you want to go?” This approach did nothing to make Geraldine feel special, so she answered, “Let me see. I’ll have to check the television schedule first.” Arriving at the dance, Elmer let the door swing shut in Geraldine’s face. She, in turn, left Elmer in an awkward situation when she huddled to talk with her girl friends and left him standing alone.

The situation may be a little farfetched, but the antics of Elmer and Geraldine doing all the wrong things on a date started a discussion on dating manners at a series of workshops held by the Ammon Stake in Idaho Falls, Idaho. The skit was a way of introducing a discussion on the subject, and the majority of the audience agreed that they are impressed by a polite girl or guy as a dating partner.

Discuss what happened in this story (what went wrong?).

What could Elmer have done better?
What could Geraldine have done?

Discuss the list of good manners for missionaries below:

1. Be on time for appointments. It is courteous to arrive at the time arranged. If you are going to be late, try to contact your appointment and explain your delay.
2. Follow your host’s lead as you are told where to sit. Don’t touch or pick up decorative items in the home.
3. Stand when another member of the family enters the room.
4. At a dinner appointment, eat what is placed before you without negative comment.
5. Show respect for the heads of the household by greeting them personally and allowing them to be in charge of the meeting being held in their home.

Perhaps the best rule of all to remember is that people are most important. The discussion or activity is secondary. Sensitivity to the needs and feelings of the people you are visiting is essential. (Taken from: Margaret Wilding, “Social Survival,” New Era, Mar 1983, 44)

Discuss the statement by Elder Bruce R McConkie:
“Courtesy is a natural outgrowth of the refining influence of the Spirit of the Lord.”

FHE Treat


Apple Pie
Prep Time: 30 Mins
Cook Time: 3 Hours (2 Hours for cooling)
Serves: 8


1 box Pillsbury® refrigerated pie crusts, softened as directed on box
6 cups thinly sliced, peeled apples
3/4 cup sugar
2 tablespoons all-purpose flour
3/4 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/8 teaspoon ground nutmeg
1 tablespoon lemon juice

1- Heat oven to 425 degrees F. Place 1 pie crust in ungreased 9-inch glass pie plate. Press firmly against side and bottom.
2- In large bowl, gently mix filling ingredients; spoon into crust-lined pie plate. Top with second crust. Wrap excess top crust under bottom crust edge, pressing edges together to seal; flute. Cut slits or shapes in several places in top crust.
3- Bake 40 to 45 minutes or until apples are tender and crust is golden brown. Cover edge of crust with 2- to 3-inch wide strips of foil after first 15 to 20 minutes of baking to prevent excessive browning. Cool on cooling rack at least 2 hours before serving.
(Recipe from

FHE Game / Activity


Play “Mother May I?”

One person is chosen to be on or Mother.
The rest of you must stand in a line facing them a short distance away. The aim of the game is for you to cross the space and touch Mother. But you can only move one at a time following the instructions given by Mother.

Mother will give an instruction to each person in turn such as “Grace, take one giant and three baby steps.”
Grace must say “May I?”
And then take her steps as told.

(OR you can ask mother–ex: “Mother may I take 2 Giant steps forward?” and mother responds either: “Yes you may” or “No you may not.”)

If you forget to say “May I?” or don’t do the steps correctly you have to go back to the start.

The first one to reach Mother becomes the next Mother.

*For Teenagers* Take time to do a self-evaluation:

1. Am I considerate when asking for or accepting a date?
2. Do I dress appropriately for the occasion?
3. Can we have a good time without spending a lot of money? Do I plan interesting things to do?
4. Am I a good conversationalist? Do I avoid talking too much about myself?
5. Do I resist having to be the center of attention?
6. Do I avoid talking about other dates I have had?
7. Do I avoid situations or actions that would be embarrassing to my date?
8. Do I have a sense of humor?
9. Do I make my date glad to be with me?
10. Do I return home by the time arranged with parents?

Join the Discussion!
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Aleah Ingram
Aleah Ingram
Aleah is a graduate of Southern Virginia University, where she studied English, Creative Writing, and Dance. She now works full time as a marketing and product manager, writer, and editor. Aleah served a mission in California and loves baking, Lang Leav poetry, Gaynor Minden pointe shoes, and Bollywood movies.

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