We all know that acting like a grownup is not exactly tied to chronology. You can be old and act sophomoric or young and carry great wisdom. One thing is certain. We want to grow up. We have a sense that life is better and happier for real grownups.
For most of us, though, happy maturity is a process and time helps. Here are some key indicators—13 signs that you are finally a grownup. We could also call these 13 signs of being spiritually mature.
What would you tell your younger self about how to be?
You don’t always have to be right or impressive.
You finally learn that you have wasted too much of your time on impression management and you see that all you have to offer others is what you are. It is OK—and even important–to be vulnerable since that is the human condition and that is who we all are. You will connect more deeply with others hearts when you don’t work so hard to impress them. Besides, seeking to impress others, simply wears you out. It’s too much work.
The same goes for always needing to be right. You understand that someone who always needs to be right is saying that they can’t learn or profit from another’s knowledge or expertise. A great phrase to remember, especially in marriage is, “I believe you could be right.”
You’ve learned that fear or stress does not improve your performance.
You recognize that too much of your life has been twisted in fear and anxiety, hoping your performance can be good enough or that things will work out just as you hoped. A sage once quipped, “I know worry helps, because most of the things I worried about, never happened.” It is folly to think that we can control the outcome of events in our lives. Too many other factors play in.
You have also learned that it is dangerous to let fear be your motivation—whether in seeking to win another’s love or in any endeavor.
What we can do is obey the commandment to “fear not”, given by the Lord who sees with perfect clarity and knows this: “I hate to spoil the end of the story for you, but everything is going to be OK.”