For many mid-LDS singles, meeting new people can be difficult. Long gone are constantly changing college classes and frequent activities designed to help people connect. Chances are, if you’re a mid-LDS single, you’ve see the same ten people every day at work and the same ten people at Church. Sure, you can always turn to the internet, but a lot of people struggle with how unnatural this can feel. With all of this combine, not only is it hard to start new friendships, but dating within this pool can seem hopeless.
However, it is not impossible! Here are five tips on how you can still meet new people and make lasting connections in a natural way.
Do your home and visiting teaching. Most people don’t just want a person who visits their home once a month, if that, and never tries to get to know them. The best home and visiting teachers are friends. They genuinely care about the people they visit and work hard to make sure the relationship is built on trust and availability. Fulfilling this important calling is an easy way to do your duty and hopefully make a new friend.
Ask more vulnerable questions. Relationships are built on risk and vulnerability. While you definitely don’t want to be too open with someone you’ve just met, you can ask questions that open up the conversation a little more. Go beyond asking how someone is doing. Some good examples are “What has been on your mind lately?” or “What are you most excited for in the upcoming week?” Be willing to listen and then open up yourself.
Learn something new. People who have shared interests can make fast friends. Consider researching local classes or groups. It can be something you are already passionate about or something you’ve always wanted to learn. Many community centers have open enrollment classes for adults; some colleges do as well in the summertime. Don’t be afraid to go by yourself and talk to the people you meet.
Don’t focus solely on dating. Some of the most fulfilling relationships in life aren’t romantic. If we spend all of our time focusing on finding someone to date, chances are you’ll miss building some really great friendships with both men and women, both young and old. If you focus on building strong relationships with those around you without the pressure of dating, you’ll feel less stressed and more open.
See who is already around you. A lot of times we overlook the people around us. There may be more opportunities than you think. Remember, God has placed everyone in your life for a reason. This really does mean everyone! Just as a missionary in the field is placed in the paths of grocers and bus-riders and joggers, you cross paths with people. Try to take the time to notice the people who are already in your life. Keep your mind open and be willing to learn more about people you think you’ve already judged. You may just be surprised at who you connect with.
Aleah is a graduate of Southern Virginia University, where she studied English, Creative Writing, and Dance. She now works full time as a marketing and product manager, writer, and editor. Aleah served a mission in California and loves baking, Lang Leav poetry, Gaynor Minden pointe shoes, and Bollywood movies.