Girls… My friends are always complaining that they can not understand girls. I am no exception, the more I talk and date girls the less sense they make. So I decided in an effort to understand girls better, I would start asking girls what we as guys can do better.
When I asked for advice on “What we could do better at?” I was expecting something that I did not understand. But not only did I understand, I agreed with basically everything I was told. I decided these guidelines were valuable enough that I wanted to share them with you. Here they are.
(Note, because these things are what girls told me, it is written in the perspective of a girl.)
Stick up for me.
A little teasing is ok. But when we are in a group and everyone is teasing me… Deep down inside I am praying that you will stand up for me. I am praying that you will tell them to knock it off. I want to know that you care about how I feel. Take away my doubt, stand up for me, if nothing else it will show me you care.
“PDA” What is ok.
I may not be a fan of “public displays of affection”… But I do not want to be disowned when we are in public together. If we are dating, it is ok to hold my hand in public. It is ok to show people we are together. I am ok with, and enjoy the little displays of affection as they remind me you care.
Value time with me.
Spend time with me. You can put down that controller, or your phone while I am with you. I promise I will do the same. Place greater value on me than games or texts, I may not always express it but when you value your games more than me it hurts. Games are not bad, but ignoring me hurts.
“Bro’s” are ok.
It is ok to have friends. I have friends also. But please be loyal. When you talk about me, treat me as a lady. Do not degrade me in front of your friends, I promise I will not either. It is important to have time to spend with others. I do not mind you wanting to do things with the “bro’s”. I know you value me by your actions, and if I feel valued I am totally ok with you spending time with the bro’s. Go ahead enjoy a guys night with good clean fun. I also need time with my friends! After all they say “absence makes the heart grow fonder.”
Please be a man.
When I see you acting like a man, it makes me proud that we are together. When I see you stick up for someone who needs help. Or even the simple acts of opening a door, paying for dinner, giving me flowers. Those simple acts go a long way to reminding me why to me, you are the gentleman I want in my life. And true men never talk down to or hurt ladies. It is simple as that. True men bring out the best in us.
Aleah is a graduate of Southern Virginia University, where she studied English, Creative Writing, and Dance. She now works full time as a marketing and product manager, writer, and editor. Aleah served a mission in California and loves baking, Lang Leav poetry, Gaynor Minden pointe shoes, and Bollywood movies.